door to door in 120 minutes

Elliot and I took the bus home today. While environmentally conscientious, it’s certainly not the quickest way home. Although, things would have been a bit more streamlined sans child.

The trip home was a multi-step process:

Step 1: Catch bus from downtown to Elliot’s daycare. This was easy and I timed it well.

Step 2: Figure out what bus stop to get off at, and then proceed to get off.

Step 3: Find Elliot. I thought he’d be outside, but I couldn’t see him playing. So I went inside. He wasn’t in his classroom or the “pickup” classroom. So back outside it was, and I found him second time round. He was wearing a bright orange short, so not sure why I didn’t see him the first time.

Step 4: Walk to bus stop. Slowly.

Step 5: While waiting for bus, respond to Elliot’s “I’m thirsty” and “I’m hungry” pleas. Greg and I are expert parents now and we have learned to come prepared for these pleas, or there will be hell to pay. I was able to provide water and snacks.

Step 6: Get on bus. Unfortunately it was the milk run, but I didn’t feel like waiting 15 minutes for the next bus. So we got to go back downtown and then we were treated to a scenic trip through Saxe Point.

Step 7: Figure out what bus stop to get off at, and then proceed to get off.

Step 8: Carry Elliot “until that pole”. I made a mental note to bring a backpack next time so I don’t have to juggle five things and carry a 40 lb child.

Step 9: Discover that your child has a much better sense of direction than his mother as he immediately requests to go to the “Library” Park. He’s been to this park maybe ten times over the past three years, and can’t see it from where we are walking. Yet he knows it’s close. I agree to go to park.

Step 10: Play at park. This was no big chore since it was such a beautiful day.

Step 11: We call it the Library Park for good reason…it’s right by the library. Consider Elliot’s request to go in a get a library book. Sure, why not.

Step 12: Trip to bathroom. Unfortunately we didn’t avert a minor accident, but thankfully Elliot doesn’t mind walking around in wet underwear.

Step 13: Pick out book. Elliot was more interested in toys, so I picked out the book. Halfway through my selection process Elliot announces he has to poop. Based on the smell in the vicinity, I check his pants to make sure he didn’t already. Thankfully just gas. He decides he’ll wait to get home to poop.

Step 14: Attempt to use automatic checkout to take out book. Computer Science graduate can’t figure it out so we go to main checkout desk.

Step 15: Leave library, head for home. Have to walk through the “Boat” Park, Elliot’s favourite park. I agree to do five underducks.

Step 16: With the five underducks complete, we head for home. I have to carry Elliot up a very large hill. I make a second mental note to bring a backpack.

Step 17: Elliot finds newfound energy and races for home with about 100 m left.

Step 18: I arrive home a few seconds later…almost two hours after I left work.

But it was sunny, I spent that whole time with Elliot, and dinner was ready when we got home.

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