it’s my birthday and i’ll party if i want to…

And I don’t want to. I think this is my first birthday ever where I truly did not need to do anything to celebrate. That’s not to say it went unnoticed — I got cards, a new purse, the promise of new hiking shoes, treated to lunch and a trip to Plum, dinner made for me, birthday cake, a decorated chair, calls from family and friends, and happy birthday was sung to me three times. But none of this was pre-planned by me — it just all happened. Spontaneously, from my point of view.

Usually I feel this big buildup to my birthday, I plan some sort of celebration, and a lot of times I’ve felt let down at the end of the day because the day hasn’t lived up to my expectations. This year there were no expectations. And I don’t think it’s a bad thing. I was talking to kaptaink about it today, and we were thinking that perhaps it’s a reflection of how satisfied I’m feeling with life in general. Things are going tickety-boo (for the most part), and I don’t feel like I need a pick-me-up for my birthday. Not that those who want to celebrate are dissatisfied…I just didn’t feel the need this year.

Or maybe it’s because I’m 36 years old and I’ve decided the next party won’t be until I’m 40. Regardless of the reason, I’ve had a nice day, and will go to bed feeling happy.

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